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Having the afternoon free gave me some wide-awake time to consider the weekend’s experiences. There had been plenty of excitement; in fact exciting probably wasn’t a strong enough word in some cases.
The thrill of Dili’s hairy Indian body and his masculinity as he had taken my anal virginity. The depravity of licking arses, including two big black chubs and a dwarf. The degradation of being pissed on in two successive sessions.
My innate wish to submit to the desires of other men had been sated – that’s a good word, isn’t it? It sounds like being soaked in depravity until you’re sopping with sin.
And now, in just a couple of hours, I would be at the mercy of all these guys again and I could feel their lust and their intention to push me further, deeper into the quagmire of my confused, desperate sexuality. I knew there were men on that property who intended to bend me over and fuck me, get their big, macho, senseless cocks up my arse, cum in my mouth or on my face and generally abuse me.
That, it seemed, had been the whole point, the object of the exercise. I had wanted to experienced role reversal, to be on the receiving end for a change, rather than dishing it out.
I started to think about the women I had known, the ones with whom I had had pulsating sexual relationships with. There were two or three who couldn’t wait to suck me as soon as we were alone together, and whom I would undress with carefree abandon and know they loved it, and lick them all over and fuck them and cum where I wanted to and they loved it.
We had taken from each other and given to each other and engaged in the most animalistic of practices and then got dressed and gone out and been respectable people who cared for each other. That was what made the sex so beautiful, that it was just part of the equation. Sure, there had been a lot of one-night stands too, but even then, I had found myself a little bit in love with the girl for as long as we were locked together in desire and lust and intimacy.
Suddenly it hit me that if I was going to enjoy this simpler, less demanding world of sex with men, there would have to be an element of the emotional in there too.
There had been moments that weekend when that was the case. Dili had been kind casino oyna and respectful, even as his eyes glinted with the thought of being the first man to put his cock up my arse. And I liked his hairy body. He wasn’t a great-looking man but he was a decent human being and I would always be grateful for his guiding hand.
Suddenly I stood up and started putting back the few things I had brought into my bag. I wasn’t going to stay for the mindless free-for-all that was scheduled for the evening. I looked at myself in the mirror and saw that it was still the old me and that no damage had been done.
I closed the door quietly and walked briskly down the stairs. It was mid afternoon and no one was around in the lounge and the dining room.
The fresh air hit me with a cleansing sweep and I was exhilarated as I walked down the long driveway to the road. There, I stuck my thumb out and hoped and prayed that someone would give me a lift. People drove past with that irritating 21st century refusal to get into potentially dangerous situations, while my earnest expression battled to explain myself to them.
Eventually a battered old Citroen 2CV squeaked to a halt and I hopped in.
“Just into town,” I said to the young man driving it. “You going that way?”
“Yep,” he said, and we chatted about football for the 10 minutes it took. The town was little more than a village really. The young man dropped me off outside a pub, a classic half-timbered country hostelry that served food all day and had Premiership football on TV.
I ordered a pint of lager and sat at the bar.
“Don’t suppose you could help me,” I said to the barman. “I’m looking for someone who I think lives around here. Ivan. Latvian guy, mid sixties, big chunky bloke.”
“Ivan, yeah,” the man said. “He lives over there, flat above the launderette. Don’t often see him but he was in here last night.”
I drank my pint and left, enjoying the feeling of not belonging anywhere, no one knowing where I was. I rang the bell by the door next to the launderette and heard heavy footsteps lumbering down the stairs.
Ivan opened the door, looked at the bag in my hand, then looked behind me to see if there was more to the situation than first appeared.
He invited canlı casino me in and ushered me up the stairs. He turned off the television and made us both a sandwich and a cup of tea. We talked about everything except why I was there and I discovered his English was in fact excellent. He just used it as an excuse when he didn’t feel like speaking.
“You look tired,” he said after a lull in the conversation. “Do you want to lie down?”
“That would be nice,” I said and followed him into the bedroom, which was tidy and the bed was made. It was a plain blue duvet cover and white sheets. Ivan went into e bathroom and I got undressed and slipped into bed. When he came back in he didn’t look at me, but pulled his shirt over his head. I admired his big belly and hairy chest. He unzipped his jeans and sat on the bed to remove them and his big, loose boxer shorts and socks. Then he stood and looked at himself in the mirror before turning to me.
“Fat old man,” he said, not unhappily.
Ivan pulled back the duvet and got in beside me, leaving the covers down. His big, tired body lay there with a thousand stories to tell. Stories of girls, women and men. He lay looking at the ceiling and I just admired him. My cock began to stir and as it did so, Ivan reached over and took it in his hand. He tickled my balls and stroked my inner thighs. His now cock was now standing up. It was a long, fat, proud warrior, dauntingly big but somehow gentlemanly because it belonged to someone who would not do me any harm. He liked to play a bit rough and heavy, but he was considerate.
As I toyed with this thought, Ivan knelt up. He took my hands and put them above my head on the pillows. He held them there as he manoeuvred on top and he hovered over me, his erect penis over mine. Then he moved up and put his knees on my arms, so his cock and balls were over my face.
“You didn’t want your big party?” he asked.
“No,” I grunted.
“You came looking for me,” Ivan said. “Why?”
“Because I would rather have a private party with you,” I said innocently.
“Okay, good,” Ivan replied. “What do you want to do? I know what we want to do last, but first?” It excited me that he had decided what “we” were going to do later.
“I want to lick kaçak casino your arse,” I said.
“Good,” said Ivan. He released my arms and knelt expectantly. I looked at his big pale body, chest, stomach, cock and balls hanging down. With his loose, heavy face expressionless, he was an ordinary man waiting for another ordinary man to do something extraordinary.
As for me, I was in new territory, alone in a bedroom with a naked, mature man whom I found irresistible. No one in the world knew where I was or what I was doing. Just Ivan. I looked at his body from behind. His broad, strong back. His muscular thighs. His big balls hanging there in their smart, red-brown bag. I looked at his buttocks gently concealing his entrance. I moved close and licked the man’s cleft. I smelled his aroma. I pushed my face in and my tongue made contact with his anus and he gave a little high-pitched grunt.
I licked Ivan’s arse like a starving man licking a plate. I ran my tongue over every square millimetre of it and loved what I was doing. I probably enjoyed it more than he did, because he wasn’t used to being worshiped in this way. In his mind he was just a tired old man and he didn’t understand my fascination with him. He told me this several weeks later when I visited him again.
But back to the event. When I had finished licking Ivan’s arse, he asked me again, “What do you want to do?”
“Eventually,” I said, “I want you to fuck me, but maybe not today.”
“You’re nervous,” he said quietly. “And probably a bit sore. That’s okay. What, then? You seemed to like it when I wanked into your mouth last time.”
“Yes,” I said. “I loved that. Can we do it again?”
“You better suck my cock,” Ivan said, lying back luxuriously. I went down his beautiful body, sucking his nipples and licking his navel before arriving at his penis. He was big and hard and magnificent. I sucked and licked his cock and his balls and his crotch and when he was ready he lifted his bulk and bestrode me, his big legs either side of my waist. Resting one hand on the wall behind the bed, he masturbated and I watched his balls move as he jerked himself.
When he was ready to come he pushed his cock at my lips and I parted them to receive him. His body hurled semen through his cock and into my mouth and I gently felt his balls to make sure I got everything there was to receive.
And that was the big night at the end of my big weekend. But it wasn’t the end of my times with Ivan.
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